Original cover art by the talented Jenn Guo
This is part 5 of a 6 part series about my personal experience with online dating. Click here to see other parts to this series. Stay tuned for more!
So despairing at my success rate (or rather failure rate) with online dating, I decided to get some help. Now, I didn’t really expect a CD to reveal the “Tao” of online dating to me. I mean, how could it? Would I suddenly transcend the laws of attraction and have girls messaging me lustily, telling me that they want and need me, more than Michael Jackson needs a good nose job… even more than Lindsay Lohan wants crack cocaine? Yeah, I didn’t think so either.
But you know, the claims of these dating guides are always like “Read this guide, and you’ll be able to pick up girls faster than you can find the normalized eigen-vectors of a 2×2 matrix!”… or something to that effect. Anyway, I tried to keep an open mind as I opened up this CD guide to online dating.
Well, I must admit, there’s one aspect of the CD that was very impressive: it was really comprehensive. It covered everything from making an online profile, to how to send messages, to making a phone call, to setting up a date… with not just audio instructions, but videos as well! Wow, with this, I bet even my 5 year old cousin could have tried to pick up girls online. But the thing is, none of the content was really extraordinary. From the sample profile to the sample messages, I didn’t think any of it was that great. If anything, the profile, messages, and advice all came off as a little contrived and uninspired.
There was one suggestion, however, that caught my attention. It suggested I create a fake female profile. This way, I would able to find out exactly what it feels like to be a girl on online dating.